Next Door‘s 40-Hour Training on Domestic Violence
Will be begin at Next Door’s Community Office on September 7, 2010 and run through September 25, 2010. This is the California state-mandated, 40-hour domestic violence training for those wishing to work with victims of domestic violence and their children.
When: September 7, 2010 – September 25, 2010 (Tuesdays/Thursdays evenings and Saturdays)
Download the schedule here.
Where: Next Door Solutions to Domestic Violence
234 East Gish Road, Suite 200, San Jose, CA 95112 (See Map)
Cost: $125 for Non-Domestic Violence Consortium members.
Please fill out and send the registration form
We must receive it by AUGUST 2, 2010
Send to Margarita Alcantar at malcantar@nextdoor.org or to the address above. You will hear from a staff member later in August to set up an informational interview. Please remember that the deadline for us to receive the registration form is AUGUST 2,2010.
Click here for more information.
If you have more questions, please call Margarita at 408-501-7553
Kaiser Permanente Santa Clara Grants Next Door $15,000
Great News! Long time supporter Kaiser Permenante Santa Clara has granted Next Door’s Children & Youth Program $15,000 to continue with its legacy partnership in providing Kaiser’s Educational Theater Program: PEACE Signs and Next Door’s Kid’s Club. This partnership has been helping elementary school students develop healthy conflict resolution and communication skills for almost 10 years and continues to be a great program that reaches children and helps them develop safe and healthy attitudes about life.
Next Door Chosen to Receive Sharks Foundation Grant (May 2010)
SHARKS JOIN THE FIGHT
AGAINST DOMESTIC VIOLENCE
SAN JOSE, CA—The San Jose Sharks are known for being tough on the ice. Now, the Sharks Foundation is getting tough on the issue of domestic violence by supporting Next Door Solutions to Domestic Violence.
The Sharks Foundation has pledged $25,000 to support Next Door Solutions, a non-profit organization that provides housing and assistance to victims of domestic abuse and their children.
Next Door Solutions to Domestic Violence was founded in 1971 with the goal “to end domestic violence in the moment and for all time”.
Next Door Solutions’ services include a 24-hour emergency hotline and safe shelter, transitional housing in San Jose and Santa Clara, peer counseling and support groups, and legal advocacy.
In addition, Next Door Solutions to Domestic Violence offers access to services in over 35 languages and have programs for children, teens, and the elderly.
With the Sharks Foundation joining the team, Next Door Solutions to Domestic Violence is that much closer than ever to achieving their goal to end domestic violence.
More information can be found at www.nextdoor.org.
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FOR INFORMATION: http://www.nextdoor.org
Contact: jmarcus@nextdoor.org
(408) 501-7540
“Telling Amy’s Story”
“Telling Amy’s Story” premiered at the Newseum in Washington, DC.
Check out the link to the 14 minute trailer for the documentary. Help us to share Amy’s Story by planning a screening in your community — go to telling.psu.edu to find out how.
http://pspb.org/assets/violence_trailer.html
You Can Stop it Before it Starts
Teen Dating Violence–You Can Stop It Before It Starts
According to statistics from the U.S. Department of Justice presented on a Family Violence Prevention Fund Teen Program fact sheet, young women age 16 to 25 experience the highest rates of rape and sexual assault in the nation.
National Prevalence of Teen Dating Violence
- Approximately one in three adolescent girls in the United States is a victim of physical, emotional or verbal abuse from a dating partner – a figure that far exceeds victimization rates for other types of violence affecting youth.
- Nationwide, nearly one in ten high-school students (8.9 percent) has been hit, slapped or physically hurt on purpose by a boyfriend or girlfriend.
- Nearly one in three sexually active adolescent girls in ninth to twelfth grade (31.5 percent) report ever experiencing physical or sexual violence from dating partners.
Other related issues of concern are the inability of some teens to deal adequately with the pressure they experience from their partners who may be pushing for behaviors which they find uncomfortable or unsafe, and/or sexual harassment or stalking. In addition fewer than 1 in 3 teens feel that they can talk to their parents if they are in an abusive relationship.
Young women who are victims of dating violence are more likely than their non victimized peers to engage in unhealthy behaviors such as drug and alcohol abuse, risky sex, and even suicide. They are also at higher risk for sexually transmitted disease and unplanned pregnancies.
Next Door’s Teen Programs support teenage youth exposed to DV and/or who are at risk of developing abusive relationships. The Programs provide leadership opportunities, field trips, and support groups to address the violence in the lives of young people, and drop in support for teen victims of dating violence.
Next Door offers teen workshops at 6 distinct community sites in Santa Clara County, drop in support for victims of dating violence, and dating violence education and support groups for teens. 75% of Teen Support Group participants who have completed the groups are able to identify ways to make healthy choices with regard to their relationships, thus enabling them to live happier lives free from abusive partners.
For more information please call the Next Door office at (408) 501-7550, or our 24-Hour Hotline- (408) 279-2962 if you are currently in a violent relationship.
Other Teen Dating Violence Prevention Resources
Family Violence Prevention Fund Teen Program
Find Out How You Can Save Lives
25 Saves Lives Campaign is a brand new giving option that Next Door has just recently
launched. Posted on the Next Door website in November, the 25 Saves Lives Campaign
will help increase donations while making it easier to support Next Door. The 25 Saves
Lives Campaign uses an online platform, which allows donors to make a convenient
recurring $25/month donation charged to a credit card every month instead of a larger
one-time donation. Giving $25 dollars a month is equivalent to about 83 cents a day.
MAKE A RECURRING MONTHLY DONATION.
What can 83 cents a day do? Giving 83 cents a day can give Next Door’s shelters
beds, food, clothing, and other supplies needed. The benefits of giving to Next Door
include: getting women and children immediate safety away from their abusers, providing
knowledge and support for women who are being abused, and providing women
and children with programs so they are able to get back on their feet. A small amount
each month can make a big difference.
Alviso case highlights domestic violence that is often hidden within gay community
San Jose Mercury News
Published: Janurary 11, 2010
By Julia Prodis Sulek
On a ride home from her McDonald’s job two days before she was killed, Leti Martinez told her cousin that her violent relationship with her girlfriend was over, that she wanted a fresh start.
Despite fistfights, scratches, chokeholds, black eyes and one restraining order during their four-year relationship, Martinez and Jennifer Bautista made up as often as they broke up — a typical pattern in domestic cases, whether gay or straight. And, like the worst of abuse cases, this one ended in tragedy after Bautista allegedly ran over Martinez on Dec. 28.
The case has drawn attention to domestic abuse that is often hidden within the gay community, a group that is trying to put its best foot forward as it fights for equal rights. The problem can be particularly difficult to recognize within the lesbian community because of a lingering perception that “women don’t hurt each other.”
But the percentage of domestic violence cases among gay couples is the same as for straight couples — up to 33 percent, studies show — and abusive relationships in both groups suffer the same power and control issues that can lead to violence.
“This was always seen as a guy thing: Guys do this to gals, or they do it to each other, but women don’t do it to each other,” said Wiggsy Sivertsen professor of counseling services at San Jose State University, who has been involved in domestic violence issues for many years, including training San Jose police officers in how to handle abuse among gay couples.
While the gay community makes strides in gaining acceptance in society, “we’re much like other at-risk communities,” Sivertsen said. “If we expose the dirty laundry in our community, they say, ‘See? Look what those people do to each other.’ There’s a kind of reluctance to put ourselves in a situation to be judged that way.”
Just what Martinez, 20, and Bautista, 19, did to each other over the course of their relationship will likely be a major issue in the case against Bautista, who has been charged with vehicular manslaughter and is being held on $500,000 bail.
Deputy District Attorney Dana Overstreet said she couldn’t discuss the details of the investigation, though she noted “any evidence of domestic violence may become extremely important in this case, regardless of who the aggressor is.”
The only details released about the case so far is that neighbors saw the two women arguing outside Martinez’s Alviso home, then one witness saw Martinez jump on top of the Honda’s hood before Bautista started driving down the street. Bautista stopped twice but then fled. At some point during the nearly three-block ordeal, Martinez was run over.
A restraining order filed by Bautista against Martinez a year ago, and interviews with Martinez’s family, indicate that at various times, the women appeared to be mutual combatants.
Some of the conflict appeared to surround Bautista’s other relationships. In the court document granting a temporary restraining order last January, Bautista hand-wrote, with often poor punctuation and spelling, her allegations against Martinez:
“She come to my house and she started arguing about a guy I’m seeing now. She got jealous and broke my phone. Started hitting me and slapping me chocked me left me bruises, marks,” Bautista wrote. “She was threanting me she was going to ‘kill me’ and that, ‘if she can’t have me no one can.’ ”
Bautista has declined media interviews from jail and her family could not be located for comment. Police are hoping the Bautista family will come forward to speak with investigators as well as turn over the purple Honda that is registered to Bautista’s mother.
Martinez’s family, meanwhile, is outraged that instead of being charged with murder, Bautista has been charged with vehicular manslaughter with gross negligence, which carries a penalty of up to seven years. They say that Martinez would often come home with her face scratched and black eyes.
“Leave her,” Martinez’s mother, Rhoda Vasquez, would tell her. But her daughter would always say, “No, I love her. Mind your own business.”
It’s a refrain heard time and time again in domestic violence cases of all kinds. And for better or worse, Sivertsen said, “we are really not that different from each other.”
At the LGBTQ Youth Space at the Billy DeFrank Center in San Jose, advice pamphlets about “unhealthy and abusive relationships” are available in the hangout room for their clients between the ages of 13 and 25. Of the 45 young people who are taking advantage of the center’s free counseling service, 20 say they are in an abusive relationship, and six of those are women.
“I wish one of these people were referred here,” said Cassie Blume of the Youth Space program, “to get these kids connected rather than have 19- and 20-year-olds dealing with this themselves.”
From Victim to Legal Advocate
Vershire, Vermont (CNN) — Armed with a law degree, an SUV that serves as a mobile office and her own harrowing personal history, 58-year-old trucker-turned-lawyer Wynona Ward navigates the back roads of rural Vermont.
Her mission: to aid victims of domestic violence.
Please check her story: http://www.cnn.com/2010/LIVING/01/07/cnnheroes.ward/
Kathleen Krenek on 94.5 KBAY’s South Bay Sunday
Increasing numbers of stories are coming out about celebrities like Rihanna who was beaten by Chris Brown; and the Oakland Raiders coach, Tom Cable who is accused of domestic violence; and the beautiful young Palo Alto real estate agent, Jennifer Schipsi, who was strangled to death and burned and we realize that the scope of this problem is vast and troubling. That is why Next Door is making an aggressive outreach effort to the media to spread the word about this issue. Kathleen Krenek was interviewed on November 22nd by Sam Van Zandt of 94.5 KBAY’s South Bay Sunday about this problem and we have attached the program.
Click the link to listen to Kathleen’s interview
There are also YouTube links(part 1, part 2) to the 20/20 Rihanna interview and Next Door letters to the editor about the Jennifer Schipsi murder. Please take a few minutes to read the letters and listen to these great segments!
Learn how to use your computer safely
Technology allows individuals to track and monitor the activities of others. Your cell phone, email, computer, and Internet activity can be tracked. When you use your computer or surf the Internet, your web browser and your computer leaves a trail, a trail that other people can see. If you use your phone or emails to talk about abuse, or if you access websites that you would prefer other people didn’t know about, there are a few tips that will help you remain safe:
Cell phones and cordless phones
- Traditional “corded” phones or land lines are more private than cell phones or cordless phones.
Using the Internet
- Access this site and other sites you want private from somewhere other than home. You can use a computer in a public library, at a community technology center, at a trusted friend’s house, or an Internet Café.
- Clear cookies, temporary web site files and browser history. Cookies are information that a web site leaves on your hard drive about your visit to that web site. A temporary web site file is left on your computer each time you visit a web site. One of its pages, usually the home page, is stored “temporarily” on your hard drive. Usually Internet browser software retains a list, or History, of all the web sites you visit. Refer to your software “Help” menu or technical support for further information.
- Clear the search engine. Many search engines retain and display past searches. Check whichever search engine you use for information on how to turn this feature off.
- If you add a site to your “Favorites” (also known as bookmarking) other people who use your computer can use your Favorites to see what web sites you have visited.
An excellent resource that can help you clear your cache, cookies and history is located here:
Instant / Text Messageing
Try not to discuss danger or abuse by email or Instant/Text Messaging. It is not safe or confidential. If you do use email or text messaging, make sure you use an account your abuser does not know about.
Using Emails
- When using email, do not store passwords and make sure you change your password or passwords often. Do not use obvious passwords, such as your birthday or your pet’s name. Use passwords that include both letters and numbers.
- Delete emails and files/documents. Delete emails from the “Send” or “Outbox” and then also delete emails from the “Deleted Items” box. In addition, empty the “Recycle” or “Trash Bin” of any documents before shutting down the computer. Make this a regular routine so it is not an unusual action that triggers suspicion.
Note: It is not possible to completely delete or clear all the “footprints” from your computer or online activity. Clearing your browser history will make it more difficult, but NOT impossible for someone to trace your computer use. It is always best to use a safe computer.