Domestic Violence in the Work Place–the Worst Mass Murder Suicide in New Mexico History
It seemed as though Adrienne Basciano was doing everything right. Adrienne, who found herself in a volatile relationship with boyfriend Robert Reza, found the courage to end the relationship about a year ago. Having told her close friends and family that she was “scared of him”, she must have felt a sense of relief once he moved out of their shared home and away from their twin 5 year old boys. Adrienne, trying to protect her children, found herself in a bitter custody battle with Reza, a fight that recently turned deadly.
On July 21, Robert Reza arrived at Adrienne’s place of business, a solar manufacturing plant called Emcore in Albuquerque, New Mexico. Reza stormed through his former workplace without provocation or warning, shot his first victim and continued on a spree that left three dead and two injured. Robert found Adrienne in the employee break room where she was shot several times as she lay helpless. Three others were eventually shot and wounded before Reza pointed the gun towards his head and killed himself. It is said to be the worst mass murder-suicide in New Mexico’s history.
While often viewed as a private matter, domestic violence isn’t isolated to the ‘domestic realm’ and doesn’t stay home when its victims go to work. With nearly one-third of American women (31%) reporting being physically or sexually abused by a partner, it should not be a surprise that in any mid-to-large sized company, domestic violence is affecting employees and a company’s bottom line. In fact, a study of domestic violence survivors found that 74% of employed battered women were harassed by their partner while at work. Also, domestic violence costs companies more than $735 million every year
There is no way to predict the irrational actions of an abuser, but as far as I am concerned, it is better to be safe than sorry. We must prepare for the worst in order to prevent similar situations from occurring. Business leaders must begin to consider the notion that the work place is not immune to acts of domestic violence, and view it as a serious, recognizable, and preventable problem that not only impacts the company’s bottom line but the very lives of employees.
Learn more about domestic violence and the workplace here.
IMMIGRANT VICTIMS HAVE OPTIONS
The decision to escape violence in the home is one that is almost impossible to make alone. It obviously involves major effort from victims, but it also may involve non-profit advocate groups, social service agencies, and law enforcement. The process that helps victims escape their abusers can be difficult and can be more complicated when the victim is an immigrant or a non-English speaker. A victim may be afraid to ask for legal assistance because she doesn’t speak English or doesn’t speak English well enough. She may also be afraid that she will be deported. Additionally, immigrant victims of domestic violence may believe that they don’t have the same rights or legal protections than their abusers.
EVERY person that needs help from Next Door Solutions can get help, regardless of immigration status. Immigration status is not reported to any other office and a client’s safety, privacy and confidentiality is the most important part of receiving services. ALL victims of domestic violence, including undocumented immigrants have legal rights, legal options and a means to escape their abuser without the risk of deportation or losing their children. One such option is the Violence Against Women Act (VAWA), which was passed by the United States Congress in 1994. Under the Violence Against Women Act, non-citizens who are married to or who have, within the previous 2 years, divorced U.S. citizens or legal permanent residents can petition to obtain legal permanent residence. So, instead of a victim depending on an abusive partner for immigration status, a victim can apply for residency in a confidential statement without the approval or knowledge of their spouse.
If a victim’s abuser is not a U.S. citizen or a legal permanent resident, she may not use VAWA to gain residency, but can apply for a U-Visa or a U-Non Immigrant Status. A U-Visa provides legal immigration status to non-citizens who are willing to assist police in the investigation of the crimes against them. To apply for a U-Visa, a victim’s abuser doesn’t need to be a U.S. citizen or even a lawful resident, and the victim does not have to be married to the abuser. The only requirement of the U-Visa is that the violent crime must be reported to the police and applicants must be willing to assist officials in the investigation and prosecution of the crime.
For every case of partner abuse and domestic violence, there usually is a pattern of control placed on the victim to prevent her from leaving. Whether it is financial, emotional, or physical, abusers find many ways to trick their partners into staying. Leaving an abusive partner is difficult enough under such circumstances, but immigrant victims have the added threat of deportation and the loss of their children as well. However, by providing immigrant victims with information about their rights and their legal options, we can give them alternatives to violence, abuse, and torment.
LAS VICTIMAS INMIGRANTES TIENEN OPCIONES
La decisión de escapar de la violencia en el hogar es casi imposible de llevar a cabo a solas. Obviamente se requiere un gran esfuerzo por parte de las victimas pero también se requiere de ayuda por parte de organizaciones sin ánimo de lucro, agencias de servicios sociales, y de la ley. El proceso de escapar de un abusador puede ser difícil y puede ser complicado cuando la víctima es un inmigrante o alguien que no habla Ingles. La victima puede tener miedo de pedir ayuda legal porque ella habla muy poco Ingles o por qué no lo habla. Ella también puede tener miedo de ser deportada. Además, las víctimas de violencia domestica a veces creen que no tienen los mismos derechos que sus abusadores.
TODAS las personas que necesitan ayuda de Next Door Solutions pueden recibirla, no importa el estado legal. El estado legal no es reportado a ninguna otra oficina. El mantener la seguridad, privacidad y confidencialidad de los clientes son los aspectos más importantes cuando ofrecemos nuestros servicios. TODAS las víctimas de la violencia domestica, incluyendo inmigrantes indocumentados tienen derechos, opciones legales, y medios para escapar de sus abusadores sin correr el riesgo de ser deportados o de ser separados de sus niños. Una de esas opciones legales es el acta de la violencia contra las mujeres (VAWA). La cual fue aprobada por el Congreso de los Estados Unidos en 1994.Bajo este acta, las personas que no son ciudadanas y quienes estén casadas o divorciadas-durante los dos años previos- con un ciudadano de los Estados Unidos o un residente legal, pueden pedir que se les otorgue la residencia permanente. Así que en lugar de tener que depender del abusador por el estado legal, la victima puede aplicar por residencia legal sin la ayuda del abusador y de manera confidencial.
Si el abusador de una víctima no es ciudadano de los Estados Unidos o residente legal, la victima tal vez no pueda hacer uso de VAWA para obtener su residencia; pero tal vez si pueda aplicar por una visa U. La visa U provee estado legal a personas que no son ciudadanas y quienes desean colaborarle a la policía en la investigación de los delitos cometidos en contra de ellos. Para aplicar por la visa U, el abusador de la víctima no tiene que ser ciudadano o ni siquiera residente, y la victima no tiene que estar casada con el abusador. El único requerimiento para la visa U es que el delito debe ser reportado a la policía y las victimas o aplicantes tienen que estar dispuestas a colaborarle a los oficiales en la investigación y en el procesamiento del delito.
En cada caso de violencia domestica y abuso entre parejas, usualmente existe un patrón de control por parte del abusador y el cual es ejercido en contra de la victima para evitar que ella lo abandone. Dichos patrones de control pueden ser a nivel financiero, emocional, o físico. Los abusadores siempre encuentran formas para hacer que sus víctimas no los abandonen. Así que bajo ciertas circunstancias, es difícil abandonar una pareja abusiva, y las victimas inmigrantes tienen además la amenaza de ser deportadas y separadas de sus niños. Sin embargo, les podemos dar alternativas a las víctimas para que escapen la violencia domestica, tormentos, y abusos si les proveemos información sobre los derechos y opciones legales que tienen como víctimas.
What the Recent Supreme Court Ruling on Guns Means for Victims of Domestic Violence
Last week the Supreme Court ruled that the right to have a gun in the home for self-defense applies to states and localities. What this means on the street is that in places like Chicago, the city cannot restrict access to guns for ordinary, law-abiding citizens. The Supreme Court also reaffirmed that the Second Amendment right to bear arms is not an unlimited right. While the National Rifle Association wants to give anyone, anywhere the right to own a gun, the Supreme Court in this decision repeats that its decision does not cast doubt on long standing laws that prohibit felons and the mentally ill from owning guns. This is an important point. The Supreme Court is not challenging laws that already restrict gun ownership to criminals.
While this is a good reminder that we have these laws on the books and that the Supreme Court is not looking to change them at the moment, for victims of domestic violence, the ruling may not be enough. Already the National Rifle Association is using this ruling as a stepping stone to challenge laws that restrict gun ownership, that would allow ALL people, regardless of whether they are criminals or not, to have the right to own guns. They seem to believe that even if you are an abuser who has been convicted of a violent crime, that the abuser should still have the right to own a gun, despite the fact that access to guns increases the risk of intimate partner homicide more than five times more than in instances where there are no weapons.
Approximately 80 Americans die from guns EVERY DAY. And EVERY DAY 3 to 4 of these people are women shot and killed by current or former husbands or boyfriends. While the Supreme Court still upholds the laws that prohibit gun ownership to the men that kill these women, there are those who believe that a woman’s life is not as important as her abuser’s access to the gun that can take her life.
To learn more about the issue, check out:
http://www.endabuse.org/content/features/detail/1534/
and also
-Jono Marcus
Next Door Solutions to Domestic Violence
Next Door featured on ABC 7′s “The View From The Bay”
Jeannie Mirassou talks about the warning signs of domestic violence on this segment of ABC 7′s program ‘The View From The Bay”
Domestic Violence Against Men: Why Wasn’t More Attention Paid to Gary Coleman?
While the details of actor Gary Coleman’s death are still unclear, it is safe to say that the whole situation is a bit bizarre. On May 28, Coleman apparently fell down in the kitchen while his ex-wife, Shannon Price, was upstairs. When Price heard his cry for help, she chose not to assist Coleman but instead called 911 for help. On the dispatch calls, Price can be heard telling the dispatchers that her help would only extend to handing Coleman a towel, since the sight of blood was just too much for her to handle.
Coleman survived the trip to the hospital but died when Shannon made the decision to remove him from life support, not even 48 hours after the fall occurred. The day after Shannon’s decision to turn off the life support machine (the legality of which continues to be disputed), she was smiling for a series of photos and did a television appearance defending herself. While her lack of compassion for her live-in ex-husband is shocking, what is most concerning about this story is the fact that nobody seems to be discussing Coleman’s death as a result of a domestic violence dispute.
It’s no secret that Coleman and Price have had a rocky relationship and a history of violent behavior. While neither was accused of physically attacking the other, both had been arrested at different times for domestic violence. When on a televised appearance on “Divorce Court”, Coleman stated that they had an ugly fight at least once a month. Price explained that Coleman would act like a child during their arguments and would often “bash his head into the wall”.
If violence was so prevalent in their home, why aren’t more people questioning the role it might have played in his fall? Is it possible that if the genders of the couple were reversed, both the public and the media would insist that the death was not just a result of an accidental fall. Such assumptions aren’t surprising, seeing as though the statistics show that violence against women is far greater than violence against men, but that is not to say that it doesn’t happen or require more attention than is currently given.
Very little is known about the actual number of men who experience violence by their female partners, but it has been reported about three-fourths of the persons who commit family violence are male. The idea that men could be victims of domestic abuse and violence is so unthinkable that many men will not attempt to report the crime, for fear of humiliation and a loss of pride. If and when a male victim does share the fact that they are in a violent situation, they are often times not believed or taken seriously.
Case and point? Just look at Gary Coleman, a man who verbally expressed that he was in an explosive relationship and yet his situation was not taken seriously by his friends, family, the public, or the media. It’s time we recognize that violence against men is not just a possibility but a reality, a reality that needs to be given the proper attention it deserves. No one, man or woman, should ever feel as if violence in the home is acceptable, warranted, or inescapable.
How Do ~YOU~ Define Feminism?
I have been listening to talks by famous thinkers on the TED.com web site. It is a jewel for anyone who wants to listen to provocative and exciting speakers analyzing topical and relevant issues. One of the speakers – Kavita Ramdas in a pod cast entitled “Radical Women Embracing Tradition” gave me a different side of the prism to view the issue of violence against women. I was so intrigued that I want to get it out, look at it and ask your opinion about it.
For me, violence against women has its roots in sexism and its oppressive force felt through domination and second-class citizenry. In that respect, it is not unlike racism, classism and other types of “isms” in our society. However, Kavita points out that the oppression of women differs from other types of oppressions. Classism represents oppression by a ruling class, racism by one race against another. Both are discrete and identifiable political and economic structures.
Oppression of women and the violence used to hold women in place comes through deeply held traditions, beliefs, values, and culture. It is intertwined into contemporary and traditional music, literature and traditions. It is not as distinct. Women must live through and are the keepers of those traditions, beliefs, values, and culture. Although globally cultures vary considerably from one place to another, the common result is the same – women’s bodies are mutilated, raped, beaten and used; free will bent, smashed, and destroyed. We are a commodity regardless of the geography in which we find ourselves.
Women must design actions that include the very culture, values, and beliefs that hold us down. What works in one culture cannot be replicated in another. I gather three thoughts from this analysis. 1. We must devise our own actions. We cannot use civil rights, or anti poverty models. Women in African nations will not use western culture’s models. 2. We must support our sisters and allies in their work, not ask to adopt our solutions or priorities. 3. We must stand together without judging whose culture is worse. Any culture that promotes violence against women cannot be tolerated, yet we must not attempt to destroy all of the moving parts of the underpinnings. We must use the very tools meant to oppress as means to gain freedom.
The Yeardley Love Story: Not As Uncommon As We Think
As a recent college graduate, the Yeardley Love story has really struck a chord in me. Love, a University of Virginia senior, was found dead in her apartment just last week, a victim of what appears to be intimate partner abuse. The story has spread like wildfire throughout the country, audiences shocked that something so brutal could happen to a young woman with such a bright future ahead of her. What the country fails to realize is that Yeardley’s circumstances are not out of the ordinary, but rather has garnered more attention to due to the deadly outcome.
I have seen first hand the extreme behavior that takes place in a college setting. While I’m not exactly sure why this is, behavior that is deemed irrational or extreme in the ‘real world’ is acceptable as a college co-ed. It has been reported that Yeardley’s boyfriend, George Huguely, often lost control and became physical after nights of drinking. It is only now, after Yeardley’s death, that her friends are recognizing his behavior should have clued them into a cycle of abuse that came to a heartbreaking end.
What concerns me the most, and what has come to light thanks to Yeardley, is the lack of action take by University’s to curb such violent behavior. Never once did I see on my college campus a flyer for support groups dedicated to domestic violence victims or posters with hotline numbers to call. Perhaps if more attention were given to the issue, people would be better equipped to recognize the signs of abuse, and young women like Yeardley would feel more comfortable asking for help.
If there’s a lesson to be learned from Yeardley’s story, I believe it is this: intimate partner abuse can happen to anyone of us. According to a recent survey conducted by the Family Violence Prevention Fund, nearly 1 in 3 teenagers who have been in a relationship report actual sexual or physical abuse, or threats of physical abuse. This is an alarmingly high statistic, and yet we all still act shocked when stories like Yeardley’s show up on the news. It is possible that our misperceptions of domestic violence victims, such as them being lower class or financially dependent on their abusers, prevent us from seeing any red flags that may be present. The conversation needs to be started and while it is tragic that it took the death of a young woman on a bright path, it’s important that her death not be in vain. Now is the time for increased dialogue and open communication, so that women know they are not alone in their struggle.
-Elisabeth, Assistant to Kathleen
We’ve Lost Our “Girl Cell”, But Is It Too Late To Regain It?
Author and playwright Eve Ensler recently stated that she believed all human beings are equipped with a “girl cell”. The cell, according to Ensler, is responsible for compassion, empathy, and vulnerability, all of which are required to sustain future generations. Over time, patriarchy has suppressed this gene by convincing the population that these characteristics are a sign of weakness, not of strength. While I believe Ensler was largely referring to the relationship between an abuser and the abused, her point also illustrates how such desensitization is shaping society’s views of victims today.
A couple of months ago, it became public that female ESPN broadcaster Erin Andrews was the target of a sexual predator. The man was stalking her when she traveled for assignments and even placed hidden video cameras in her hotel rooms. This man was a complete stranger, having only seen her on television, yet he successfully robbed her of her privacy. Erin was living every woman’s worst nightmare.
What shocked me the most about this story was the way in which the public reacted. While this hasn’t happened to all women, can’t we all relate in some way, shape, or form? The response of the public, specifically those made by fellow women, was deplorable. Instead of encouraging Erin or viewing her situation with compassion, people seemed to act as if she deserved the circumstances she found herself in. “She’s on TV- this kind of attention comes with the territory”. “Maybe if she didn’t dress like that, this wouldn’t have happened”. Why is it suddenly appropriate to categorize victims as “asking for it”?
Eve Ensler was right; our compassion and sense of camaraderie has been stripped from us. Victims of domestic violence need to be encouraged and empowered. They need to understand that they are worth fighting for. If they don’t receive this support from their sisters, where else are they supposed to get it? What kind of message does it send to the abusers; that violence against women is okay in certain circumstances? It is imperative for society to regain our “girl cell” and relearn the art of compassion. Only then will we be able to take a collective stand and show the world that violence, under any circumstances, should not and will not be tolerated.
You can see Eve Ensler talk about the girl cell on Ted.Com.
A Message From Kathleen
April 15, 2010
A new Public Service Announcement from Kathleen Krenek.